Nov 3, 2007

Tera life itna boring hai!

I like to think that I am a friendly guy. As in, people generally won’t go out of the way to avoid me when they see me walking down the road. Or pretend their network conks off when I call them. (in fact, some complain that I do not call them!). So, most weekends, I either make an effort to meet up with some friends, or they call me up and coerce me into meeting them.
But some weekends, I am too lazy to venture out. Normal, one would think. Not according to the MBA 'Law of the Weekend', it seems.

A typical chat conversation with any random friend goes like this:
Random Friend (RF): Dude, wht’s the plan for the evening?
Me: Nuhtin yaar…
RF: C’mon man, how can u sit at home on a weekend?
Me: arre, feeling lazy yaar ("which section in the IPC makes it a crime to sit at home on a weekend?")
RF: tera life itna sad hai yaar/tu itna sad hai yaar/fin guys are boring man/paani mein doob mar/isliye tujhe ladki nahi milti etc…
Me: ttyl ( "tnx a lot buddy for reminding me abt how sad my life is! What would one do in life without you?")

RF logs off, probably goes out and has ‘fun’. Me, go back to my interrupted AoE game (“just when I was thrashing the enemy, I get a ping. Murphy bugger. Must remember to log off gtok before I start AoE”).

And then, I wonder…

Sitting in a dark place, munching on buttered popcorn (see Ms. Dietician, am getting calorie conscious… happy?), and watching sad hero (with six pack abs!… should start exercise) flirt with my sexy heroine (oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, how can someone be sooooo beautiful… should put her pic as wallpaper, but Asin rules... for now), is considered ‘fun’ activity? Not my cup of tea.
Going to shopping mall, window shopping, dreaming about the things you will buy (or get your ‘friend’ to buy), and about the things that you can never afford (yeah, they have a Rolls Royce in the Atria mall, Worli) is a ‘fun’ activity? All men who like shopping, raise your hands. Ok, ok, your girlfriends are not looking. Now... look ma, no hands!
Going to a place, eating 2 mouthfuls of expensive crab (not crap, crab, tastes good), carrying polite conversation about how the job is, moving on to more impolite conversation of how it sucks, and even more impolite topics of who is going around with whom ("mera number kab aayega?"), is ‘fun’ activity?
Going to a place, ordering fermented barley water, paying thrice the MRP for it, and feeling happy that they give free peanuts to munch (peanuts... that reminds me, boss, how about a raise?), is ‘fun’ activity?
Going to CCD/Barista, staring at the sinful chocolate pastry (oh man, I wish I could have it, but my jeans is already tight), then ordering exotically named beverage (I can’t pronounce it, so it must be worth the 100 bucks they charge), sipping it while slyly observing the heavy duty necking going on in the adjacent table (ahem dude, 'Dark Temptation' is the name of the pastry... not the title of the movie that you downloaded last night and decided to screen for us, LIVE!), is ‘fun’ activity?
Going to a place, rolling a heavy ball trying to hit nine sticks at the far end of the room, or using a long pole to push multi-coloured round balls into a hole, is ‘fun’ activity?

But, sitting at home, playing a fabulous game of AoE, royally kicking your enemy’s ass, feeling good about it, doing a victory dance in the privacy of your room… is a ‘sad’ life?

I beg to disagree. The only time it is sad is when the computer royally kicks your ass.

You go and have your ‘fun’. I am happy with my ‘boring’ life.

PS: Friends, this doesn’t mean the next time you plan a movie, dinner, or a meet, you conveniently forget to invite me. All of that is ‘fun’ for me too. Serious.

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