Nov 7, 2007

Remember Murphy?

Just when I thought my friend Murphy had gone off to Bangalore to stay with my other friend Monk, he pops up today to say Hi. That is what I like about Murphy. You see, there are some friends to whose place you will go only if you are invited; there are other good friends to whose places you will invite yourself to; then, there are those closest friends whom you can visit without giving notice. Just spring a surprise on them, when they least expect you. You can be rest assured that in spite of you barging in at very inappropriate times, they will still welcome you with a smile. Now, Murphy is one of my closest friends. So, naturally he has the ‘haq’ to drop in announced, any time he feels like.

I should have suspected Murphy would be arriving. He hadn’t visited me in a long time. Today was a very usual day, a xerox copy of so many previous days.

Go to office, log in to gmail, mail, chat, update stupid cheapo status msg, remember that work is to be done, do work, read blogs, do more work, crib to friends about work, crib to friends about not having ‘good’ work, eat tasteless lunch, remember mom’s cooking, come back to reality, solve Hindu crossword, give up half way, order coffee, ask for extra strong coffee to guard against drowsiness, fall asleep anyway, remind self that ‘power nap’ is a concept only in theory and not when your boss comes around to see how work is progressing, start cribbing about snacks not coming one hour before it usually comes, eat tasteless snack and wonder whether the cribbing/waiting was worth it, look at watch, see it is 5.30, expect boss to call you since he always calls ‘after’ the official closing time, answer phone from boss, feel happy that you were proved right about him calling, feel sad that you will have sit late now, slog some more, realize that the work is not too hard and can be finished later too, pack up and leave for home… busy day, eh?

Anyways, here I am, going home after such a hard day’s work. I reach Dadar station and realize that my home keys have been conveniently forgotten in office. Now, on any usual day, I could have said ‘chuck it’ and gone home, where one or the other roomie would be there. But, both the roomies had taken off for Diwali and gone home. (u loser, why didn’t you also take leave and go home?). I call up my friend who usually sits late in office in the hope that I can ask him to pick up my keys. Call. Not reachable. Call. Not reachable. Call. Not reachable. Call. Not reachable. (yeah, BPL has doubled its network!!!). So I call another friend and tell him that if I can’t collect my keys, I will stay at his place. Now, I consider that I have the ‘haq’ to drop in unannounced, but when friends work till midnight, dropping in unannounced will mean being greeted by a locked door. He says, “No problem yaar. Isme poochne ki kya baat hai.” (thanks dude, sau saal jiyo).

Anyways, I hop into a train for Churchgate. Empty train. In Mumbai!!! Yippie… mebbe things are not so bad after all. A couple gets in. Guy starts necking around. (even he was thinking “Empty train. Yippieee”). Keep going dude, this is what I need to take my mind off forgotten keys… (man, the guy looks like a gorilla… the girl is cute though… how come all the stupid guys get all the sexy girls… I mean, ignoring minor things like my pot belly, slightly bald head, PJs and bad dressing sense, I am sexy too… after all, my name is SRK)… anyways, there is this irritating ‘chamathu payyan (CP)’ inside me who yells “move it man. Don’t embarrass them. How would you like if someone stared at you and your girl?” So for once, I listen to this CP and move on…

Anyways, I am praying hard that the security doesn’t leave early, and the office is kept open… Funny how a half atheist like me ‘prays’ when in trouble… As if, my prayer would make God delay the security guy… I mean, his wife and kids would be praying that he returns home early…

I rush back to office… the lights are on… thank you God… mebbe Mrs. Security did not pray hard enough… anyways, I collect my keys and heave a sigh of relief…

Oops, so sorry Murphy, I’ll have to see you off to Bangalore again. You see, I got the keys.

I return home thinking of happy things in life. Diwali mood. Festival of Lights. Prosperity. Joy.

I enter my building. Press the lift button. Press. No response. Press. No response. Press harder. No response.

Ok, I climb the six floors. I am wheezing, partly from the Diwali cracker smoke and partly from the effort of climbing my Mt. Everest. I am totally breathless.

One more person is breathless. Murphy. He is laughing his guts out.

PS: Happy Diwali ppl


  1. not a problem... there is enough of murphy to go around... and he can be at millions of places at the same time...

    funny though how you attribute forgetting your key at the office to an act of murphy... your interactions with him have not been sufficient. wait for my post, i hope to get it done today.

  2. You're right Murphy was in Bangalore, came to visit me in Delhi this Diwali too :) I stood in a queue for 3 hrs at the bangalore airport, checked in my baggage, flight got delayed by 3 hrs, reached delhi at 1 am.. all the while sitting in the middle of two gigantic bearded men, one who was snoring and one of them farting ( i didnt bother find out, which one). Once I reached, I realise my baggage hasn't come out.. so I fight at the airport another one hour. Then after 4 days of fighting, calling and dialling nos that were "switched off, please try again later" got to know that my bag was in chennai and I would have to go pick it up myself. Finally got it 6 hrs before my return flight to Bangalore, where I checked in my bags all over again and went praying from delhi to bengaluru... And oh, did I tell you, I got puked upon by a kid in the bus today.. Murphy I tell you, is still in karnataka :))))

  3. @ Anand:
    i know thr r enuf of murphy in this world...
    under normal circumstances, i'd hv blamed the 'forgotten key' to my senility or the fact tht i was a 'professor' at some point of time in my life...
    but for it to happen on the day when both roomies are outta town, and me carrying a huge box... that has to be Murphy...
    finally, i agree u hv better interactions wid Murphy... as i said, he STAYS wid u and visits me occasionally

    @ Priyanka
    hmm... welcome to the Murphy Fan Club... Entry by Murphy's invitation only... normally, we don allow minors, but in this case, we might consider the case...

    btw, wht is it abt u tht makes ppl fart, snore and puke...

  4. Err.. Murphy?? :))