Jun 4, 2008

The Land of the Kama Sutra...

Sometime, very very long ago, some kinked up guy let his imagination run wild, and came up with a book on the 'Art of Loving'...
Little did he know that centuries later, every pseudo-journalist in the country would take his name and the name of his book as their stock argument for any debate...

Yes sirree, "The Land of the Kamasutra" seems to be the most abused term in the media today... we'll see how...
Some weirdo politician realizes that what was one of his VIP perks (watching half-naked firang chicks gyrate) is suddenly available to the masses in the name of 'cheerleaders'... now, if every tom with a dick can enjoy the privileges of VVIP, what is the point of being a VVIP... something like every guy driving around with a beacon flashing on top of his vehicle... so, the netaji in his infinte wisdom and in the interest of serving the nation decides "Cheerleaders must cover up"... and bingo, you have journalists protesting... what they use as an argument is not the cheerleaders' right to do what they please, the people's right to watch what they please... no sir, leave such logical points aside... what we'll use is our brahma astra... "How, in the Land of the Kamasutra, can a politician be so regressive?" Indeed, how sir!

Then, one MF Husain does a nude painting of some Goddess, or of Bharat Mata herself... now, I am not going to go into the merits of allowing or disallowing "freedom of expression"... for a moment, set that aside... again, journalists and learned judges are not going to say "let us protect freedom of expression"... or even "let us leave an old man and his wild fantasies alone"... no, what they'll say is "How, in the Land of the Kamasutra, can people be so prudish about nudity?"...

and thus it goes on... Mahesh Bhatt will make his heroines parade around half-naked, and say "In the Land of the Kamasutra", this is nothing... Emraan Kiss-me will do the only thing they taught him in his acting school... when people protest about them not getting a chance to get up, close and personal with miscellaneous starlets, Emraan would not ask "Who's your uncle, mister?"... no he would say, "In the Land of the Kamasutra..."

A Miss World contest will be held, beautiful ladies in skimpy swimsuits would proclaim their ambition to save the world, foolish people would protest that they don't want to be saved by bikini clad bimbos, and the organizers would not say "What's your problem, buddy?"... they would say, "In the Land of the Kamasutra..."

At this rate, sychophants of various orders would kiss the ass of Madame S, and justify it saying, "In the metaphorical Land of Kamasutra"... Manmohan would bend over backwards to accommodate the demands of the Left, and justify it saying "bending over backwards is a rare position in the famous book..."

Finally, the next time I read this, I would like to take the newspaper and shove it up the journalist's you-know-where... and tell them to read what Mr. Vatsayayana had written about the pleasures of shoving things up people's you-know-wheres...

7 comments:

  1. how could you say such things in the land of the kamasutra...

    ReplyDelete
  2. In the land of kamasutra...such blatant candour ?! This article offends the sensibilities of all Indians who has mothers/sisters at home !!

    Specifically liked the Miss World part...

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Monk:
    indeed... how can't i?

    @ Spidey:
    does it really offend sensibilities? will I get to flee to London? will the Govt offer to safeguard me in their custody? oh goodness, will someone issue a fatwa and will I get an armcandy like Padma Lakshmi?
    ooh, i can't wait...

    ReplyDelete
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