Jun 10, 2008

God... and His sense of humour... and some senti conversation... basically random post...

Warning: Long, senti post...
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God sure has a weird sense of humour… so would you and I in his place… imagine having the power to do anything you want… imagine the power to make anyone do anything you want…

So, once upon a time, twenty five years ago, God decided to play a prank on this world… well, maybe not on the whole world (He had already done that thru one Mr. George W Bush)… but He decided to make life miserable for some select set of unfortunate people…

And thus, while no jackals howled and no vultures screeched (or at least I did not hear any), I was born… but God did not stop at that… no sir, He is too naughty for that…He ensured that my parents gave my a very god-ly name… and not just one… like any self-respecting marketer, he threw in a “buy one, get two free” deal… not on the kids, on the names…

But then, this is not about God and His pranks… this is about the conversation I had with Him, on my birthday…

Me: “Hi mate… had planned to come and meet you at the temple, but sorry I couldn’t make it… something else came up…”

God: “it’s ok buddy… have you never heard of ‘Man proposes, God disposes’?”

Me: “well, I have never proposed to anyone, leave alone to you… so how would I know?”

God: “thank God, oops thank me, you haven’t… imagine the plight of the poor girl who would have to spend all her life listening to your PJs.”

Me: “I know… but then, my mom will take care of that… after all, arranged marriages are like socialism, where a higher authority ensures you get something, irrespective of whether you deserve it or not…”

God: “dude, let’s not even start on the market versus state thingy… if the marriage market were capitalistic, you would be scratching the bottom of the pyramid… and trust me, there is no CK Prahlad in the marriage market to direct gullible girls to that market segment…”

Me: “yeah, I know… forget the girl… what I’d really like is a Ferrari… and a Malabar Hill bungalow maybe…”

God (clutching his stomach): “hohhoh… Ferrari indeed… do you even know how to drive… don’t do this to me man… my stomach aches if I laugh this hard…ROFL”

Me: "I'd like to see you actually ROFL... in fact, I'd like to see you ROFLMAO"

God: "well, I can roll on the floor and laugh your ass off..."

Me: "oops... I forgot that you are all-powerful and all that... sorry..."

God: "hmm, that's more like it... you should learn to show some respect... now, what were you asking? oh haan, Ferrari... hohohahahooo... get a driving license first idiot..."

Me: “alright, alright, maybe I don’t know how to drive a car… but if I can afford a Ferrari, I can surely afford a chauffer…”

God: “yeah indeed… keep dreaming…”

Me: “what’s wrong in dreaming? After all, I dreamt that I’d be a millionaire by 25.”

God: “And are you?”

Me: “well, I maybe off by a coupla zeroes…”

God: “see…”

Me: “but then, that shouldn’t stop me from dreaming…”

God: “Indeed it shouldn’t. Keep dreaming. You can’t face reality anyways…”

Me: “Now, why would you say that?”

God: “ever looked into a mirror after waking up?”

Me: “of course… do it every day… and I see a very handsome being…”

God: “ok, lemme correct that… ever looked into a mirror with your glasses on?”

Me: “oh… you mean… oh my… so, it is the glasses that make me look bad?”

God: “duh… the glasses make you look… blind bugger…”

Me: “but what does looking good have to do with wanting am Ferrari?”

God: “nuthin… am just playing safe… next thing you might ask for a babe to go with the Ferrari…”

Me: “hmm… that would be nice…”

God: “greedy pig… I have given you so much in life… and still you keep whining for more”

Me: "like? from what I can see, with my glasses on, you haven't given me much..."

God: “a loving family, friends who care for you in spite of you being, uh um, you… a nice job, and enough food to fill that fat tummy of yours…”

Me: “hmm… I am thankful for all that… but a Ferrari on top of all this would be nice indeed…”

And before God could raise one of His four arms and give me wonn tight slap, I got a phone call and I woke up…

It was from home, wishing me “Happy Birthday”…

And I suddenly felt thankful for a loving family, friends who care for me in spite of me being, uh um, me… a nice job, and enough food to fill that fat tummy of mine…

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PS: Birthdays always make me senti… snif snif… ppl who expected PJs kindly excoos… the PJs would be back in full flow soon enough…

PPS: All those agnostic/atheist buggers who run around screaming “God doesn’t exist”… shut up… He does exist… atleast for the purposes of this post… now be honest, tell me, if He decides to give you a Ferrari, would you say you believe in Him?

6 comments:

  1. looks like the only way i can get a ferrari...

    can u send him over to my place on my budday... he could meet my other god who would be there with me always...

    ReplyDelete
  2. @ monk:
    if i ever get a Ferrari, then i'll send Him over... else, there is no point rite?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fantastic Post!

    -hem

    ReplyDelete
  4. @ hem:

    tnx a lot man!
    btw, do u know someway by which i can get a Ferrari? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. rajasubramanian12:58 AM

    good one. it is thought provoking.god exists,so u can write such good post and i can read and enjoy. forget ferrari.u can fly in dreams.!

    ReplyDelete
  6. @ rajasubramanian
    tnx a lot...
    and am sorry, but I can't recollect anyone wid this name... kindly give some background if I know you :)

    ReplyDelete