Feb 26, 2010

Notes from a week of illness

Warning: Slightly gross. Only slightly.

You know you are a bachelor staying alone when (aka "Notes from a week of illness"):

* You go to the doctor feeling feverish, she asks whether you can get admitted for 2 days, and the first thought that crosses your mind is "Do I have two pairs of washed undies at home?"

* Of course, the second thought that crosses your mind is "I should call my parents"

* You don't get admitted, ask the doc for some pills instead, come back home and see that you did not have two pairs of washed undies, pat yourself on the back for the amazing foresight in not getting admitted, also rap yourself on the knuckles for the lack of foresight in having clean undies, and proceed to dump a ton of clothes for the maid to wash.

* You start to worry about food. Ordering doesn't make sense because the food would be oily and spicy, the one place which makes palatable non-oily non-spicy food doesn't deliver (even when told it is a matter of life-and-death), and you are too weak to make any of your own.

* You order idlis, find they are rock solid, grumble you can make better idlis, but are too lazy to bring out that idli plate that your mom lovingly bought for you, even when you get readymade atta.

* You buy satthu mavu kanji powder mix, manage to make some puke-inducing kanji, and start trying different combos with it to make it taste a bit different - so you mix it with Real Orange juice, Amul Kool, Curd, Buttermilk; you still end up being bored of that kanji.

* You finally get fed up of all this, buy half a dozen bananas and 2-3 packets of Maggi and voila, one day's meal is taken care of.

* You start getting bored of staring at the ceiling; you can't watch TV because your eyes start to burn, you can't play games on the comp because your eyes start to burn, you can't read books because your eyes start to burn; You curse yourself for not learning to appreciate music in your life.

* You start to wonder whether getting married might not be such a terrible thing, especially if someone else can make that stupid kanji for you.